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It's all about the tidal ebb and flow of love, lust and relationships today. All over the celebrisphere, couples are splitting, getting together, or at least eying each other across the room (with eyelinered eyes). And having shortiez! Like Ashlee and Pete, who have finally confirmed that a little dude or dudette is on the way. On their totally not emo-titled site friendsorenemies.com, the Wentz's officially announced the imminent arrival of a lil' Wentz. And what are people saying? Let's go to the friendsorenemies commenters. Take it away, guys:

klula: 05/28/2008 7:28 PM
congrats!!!!!!!!! im so happy 4 you both!!!!! :D

tennasballhead: 05/28/2008 7:39 PM
congrats!

boomboomcaz: 05/28/2008 7:30 PM
congrats!

idiotnation: 05/28/2008 7:48 PM
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Congratulations!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

suffocatedbitch: 05/28/2008 7:51 PM
Congratulations :)

It's not all CONGRATS!!!!!!! though... one thoughtful commenter wondered:

cupcakeloserrainbow: 05/28/2008 8:02 PM
if its a boy do you think they will name him Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz the 4th?

VERY good question. We will just have to wait and find out (fingers crossed though!).

Also Embarrassing the Family...

Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson may be the real deal - People is reporting that the two are "an item." In fact, Lohan, Ronson, Lohan little sister Ali (she gets picked on a lot) and Ronson's mom (no bold type for her) were spotted dining together in NYC. It was like Meet The Parents, but with unintentional comedy and unintended pathos. And a cheesecake dessert with four forks.

Word on the street is that ginger haired crooner Clay Aiken is going to be a daddy! But isn't he... I mean, how do you... What I'm saying is, I thought...? Wait - she was artificially inseminated? Ohhhh... OK.

Links:

Breaking News From Pete and Ashlee [friendsorenemies.com]

Lindsay & Samantha's Families Bond In NYC [People]

Clay Aiken To Be A Father [NY Daily News]

Photo via.

Tagged as: Celebs

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They Didn't Even Get In

Posted on May 28, 2008 at 11:58 AM

It's all womyn, all the time, today on the fuseblog. In NYC, the big news was last night's Sex and the City premiere at Radio City Music Hall. The four stars were present, of course, as were Sex set stylist Patricia Field and various hangers-on of the moment like Christian from Project Runway. The best part of it all, according to Sarah Jessica Parker? The fans (naturally!). BUT, says NY snarker Gawker, many of those fans were left out in the cold (humidity and scattered thunderstorms, actually), as scores, hundreds, perhaps THOUSANDS of ticket-holders were refused entry into the hall. The validity of these tickets may be in question (were they pay for admission tix? "Does not guarantee entry" passes?) but the anger, shock and tears of the women weren't. And so, in New York, if a group of TV-obsessed women wanted to get their hearts broken by a brand and not a man (or even a woman), they headed down to the corner of Sixth Avenue and Disappointment, where a SATC spokesperson was waiting to tell them that, despite their tickets, their airfares to the Grande Pomme, and their months of planning, they would not be allowed in. Sounds like the perfect opportunity to head to the B Bar, 90s style, and drown your sorrows in an appletini served by an aspiring model who won't look you in the eye.

Also Making Waves...

Michael Lohan, one-half of the winning team that gave the world Lindsay Lohan, is backing off from previous remarks which conveyed his discomfort with daughter Lindsay making out with scenester Samantha Ronson. He's got nothing against lesbians, he told the NY Daily News. He doesn't know and, more importantly, doesn't care if Lindsay gets it on with women. See, he's enlightened! Also, he made sure to note that when he hugs guys, that doesn't mean he is gay. So, maybe not so enlightened.

And speaking of not so enlightened, Donna Martin was always the 90210 character you felt a little sorry for. She wasn't a genius, she wasn't all that attractive in comparison to Brenda, Kelly, the Kathleen Robertson character, or even Brenda and Brandon's mom. But she DID graduate, which makes her return to the fabled zip code in the NEW 90210 all the more sensible. MSNBC reports that "90210," the upcoming CW series, will feature Tori Spelling reprising her role as Donna Martin, now the proprietor of one of the more fashionable boutiques in Bev Hills. You don't say. Also, Jennie Garth is back as a student counselor. And Brandon stills works at the beach club.

Links:

Sarah Jessica Reveals Best Part About Sex In New York: The Fans! [People]

Disaster At the Sex and the City Premiere? [Gawker]

I Don't Know, Or Care, If Lindsay Lohan Is Gay, Dad Says [NY Daily News]

Tori Spelling Is Headed Back To 90210 [MSNBC]

Photo via Skyshowbiz.

Tagged as: Celebs

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Sir Paul Honored, But Not Powerful

Posted on May 27, 2008 at 05:52 PM

Holiday weekend generally mean slow-ish news periods (with the notable exception of popcorn blockbuster openings - Yes, Indiana Jones opened, and yes, it did well), which can sometimes be boring but, really, can also be eye-opening. Witness the piece (below) on Sharon Stone and the fact that the Chinese are pissed at her. So what do we do in times of boredom? We (we meaning everyone on the internet, including probably you) make lists! Like MuchMusic of Canada did. They've compiled a list of the most powerful musicians, taking into account sales as well as "clothing lines, fragrances, sold-out tours, charities, enorsement deals and, of course, relevance." OF COURSE, relevance! The Top Four (there are twelve, total) includes a McDonald's spokesman, a producer who was best friends with a big rapper in the 90s, a newly married "franchise" and a "living legend." And at Number 5? Hilary Duff, who comes in ahead of Timbaland and Bono, among others. Maybe it's time to forcibly remove power from the most powerful?

Also Down In It...

Yale University, in a move possibly made to atone for "educating" George W. Bush, awarded Paul McCartney an honorary doctorate of music. Yale president Richard Levin noted that "here, there and everywhere, [McCartney has] pushed the boundaries of the familiar to create new classics." Get it?! Here, There and Everywhere! It's a Beatles song! That's why it's clever!

Whether you're a musician, or an actor, or a painter, or an entertainer of any kind, distribution is important. You can't be successful, can't be a star of no one knows who you are or, worse, if they forget you. Sharon Stone may never have been a huge star in China in the past, but she certainly won't be in the future: Sharon made some anti-Chinese government remarks at Cannes, and the Chinese are pissed. Stone attributed the May 12 earthquake to karma that China has incurred due to their control of Tibet. The Chinese have responded by announcing that past and future Stone films would not be shown in China. Now the Chinese will join the rest of the world in not seeing recent Stone films.

Links:

The Top Twelve Most Powerful Musicians Of Today [MuchMusic]

Yale Gives Paul McCartney Honorary Music Degree [Boston.com]

China Cinema To Ban Sharon Stone [Hollywood Reporter]

Tagged as: Music

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RHCP To Go AWOL

Posted on May 23, 2008 at 09:04 AM

Some good news to kick off your holiday weekend: the Red Hot Chili Peppers are taking a year off! Due to exhaustion, the Chili Peppers are taking a year off from each other, and their music. Singer Anthony Kiedis plans to spend more time with his family, guitarist John Frusciante plans to work on side projects, bassist Flea plans to spend more time shirtless, and drummer Chad Smith plans to spend time grinning goofily and wearing backwards baseball hats.

Also Kickin' It...

R. Kelly is on trial this week for two separate issues. In the courtroom of our hearts, he's on trial for making soul music that is surprisingly captivating and authoritative. In a courtroom in Chicago, however, he is on trial facing child pornography charges. That trial is not so nice. To lighten things up, the Chicago Tribune lists Five Things You Never Knew About R. Kelly.

The former Boy Band Fat Man who was once on the lam has finally been sentenced: Lou Pearlman, the former manager of the Backstreet Boys and N'Sync, has been sentenced to 25 years in federal prison for the ponzi schemes and fraud he unloaded on unwitting investors. The judge is allowing Pearlman to take off one month of the sentence for each million dollars he recovers, meaning that Pearlman can avoid jail altogether if he comes up with the dough. Which would behoove him, because we all know what prisoners think of guys that hang around with boys.

Yikes. Steven Tyler, Aerosmith crooner, father of Liv and advocate of scarf-sheathed microphone stands, has entered a rehab facility after twenty years' worth of supposed sobriety. All anyone knows is that it's for a "substance" issue. Which may be more than a small issue for Tyler, who once described guitarist Joe Perry and himself as the Toxic Twins. Walk This Way, etc. etc.

Muxtape is down! Muxtape is down! Muxtape, the legally ambiguous platform that allows users to upload tracks to a homemade "muxtape" of a mixtape for everyone to listen to, is down. A disease was uploaded, and POOF! There went the majority of muxtapes uploaded in the past three weeks. You know what would make those people who lost their muxtapes feel better? That's right - a muxtape.

Once More, With Feeling...

Red Hot Chili Peppers Disband [NME]

5 Things You Never Knew About R. Kelly [Chicago Tribune]

Backstreet Guy Headed To Prison [E! Online]

Steven Tyler Walks This Way To Rehab: Report [Reuters]

Muxtape Is Down [Wired]

Tagged as: Music

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Are You Fur Real?

Posted on May 20, 2008 at 02:46 PM

Remember that fur coat the Lindsay Lohan "borrowed?" The one that wasn't hers, but that she snapped up at the end of some party that people like you and me never go to? And remember that the owner of said fur coat was a 22 year-old college student? And then when the owner saw Lohan wearing it in OK! mag she made a big todo and then the Lohan people wanted to return it no questions asked? Well, now it's time for questions. As in, What should Lindsay wear before a judge, because this college student, Masha Markova, isn't taking the law into her on hands - she's taking it to court! Specifically the New York State Supreme Court in Manhattan. Perhaps we'll be able to witness a poignant scene at said court, a la Charlie Sheen climbing its steps at the end of Wall Street. Or maybe we'll see PETA activists go after both of these kids. Or maybe we'll just shed a tear at the ridiculousness of these two buffoons clogging up our courts and also the sad but clear decline of humanity.

Also Sad But True...

Lindsay ain't the only Lohan making headlines. Kid sister Ali has been taking all sorts of crap from her former schoolmates, who in addition to simple razzing also posted a foulmouthed YouTube video disparaging lil' Ali. Supermom Dina has since begun homeschooling Ali, which is a better situation for everyone except for those in the same home as where Ali gets homeschooled.

Nas has decided to take it down a notch when it comes to the title of his latest album. Controversially, it HAD been named N-----, a title which certainly garnered attention but of course is wrought with difficulties involving skittish distribution outlets. It will now be called NAS. But then Nas said he considered it untitled. But then he said people will know what to call it. Dude - JUST MAKE UP YOUR MIND. Anyway, it drops on July 1, Canada Day. Make of that what you will.

Again...

Fur Flies In Lindsay's Direction [E! Online]

Ali Lohan: 'Disgusting' Girls Ridiculed Me At School [People]

Nas Changes Controversial Album Title [Entertainment Weekly]

Photo via 411mania.

Tagged as: Celebs , Music

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Encroachment - Five Yard Penalty

Posted on May 19, 2008 at 01:14 PM

The typical post-breakup dirty laundry is starting to emerge from the ruins of the Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo playbook. Over the weekend Romo revealed that Jessica's football father Joe was gettin' all Parcells up in Romo's facemask, giving him "advice" on everything from his football career to endorsement opportunities. When you're a member of a tightly run organization, with a phalanx of coaches and officials making calls and setting plans, the last thing you need is another respected authority figure - or Joe Simpson - barking orders.

Also Manic-ing Our Monday...

The high profile celebrity couple breakups continue! Or really, low-profile celebrity breakups, because Shania Twain and Robert "Mutt"Lange were never attention seekers. They are, however, single; the Canuck country wailer and Def Leppard and AC/DC producer announced through a publicist that they were splitting up after fourteen years of marriage, one son and countless bad hair days.

The nominees for the 2008 Sexiest Vegetarian Award have been revealed! Paul McCartney, Bloc Party and Morrissey are among the nominees. Every year it's the same old vegetarians. Sure, New Young Pony Club were nominated, but really, who are they? We need some new vegetarian blood. So to speak.

One More Time...

Papa Joe's Meddling Made Romo Punt Jess [TMZ]

Country Star Shania Twain, Husband Splitting Up [Boston.com]

Paul McCartney, Bloc Party, Morrissey Up For Sexiest Vegetarian Award [NME]

Tagged as: Celebs , Music

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Pete Wentz Has A Bachelor Party

Posted on May 16, 2008 at 04:30 PM

Ah, the male rituals of marriage. The courtship, the proposal, the eyeliner, the bachelor party... it's all been a part of the Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson's Road To Marriage, which hit a milestone this week when bassist/groom-to-be Pete Wentz had his awesome bachelor party! Wentz, his FOB BMs (Fall Out Boy Band Mates), future manager-in-law Joe Simpson, Joel Madden (Of Madden Football) and some non-famous people kicked things off with dinner at Mr. Chow, a Bev Hills eatery. They then moved on to the Roosevelt Hotel, where they partied in a suite. Just a bunch of guys in a suite celebrating a bachelor party. FOB fans, close your eyes and imagine that scene.

Also kickin' it...

Those spring chickens Metallica kicked it 80s style and played a club show in order to prove they can keep it real. This being Metallica, though, a "club" means the 2300 capacity Wiltern Theatre in LA, which could probably fit several clubs inside. They played classics like For Whom The Bell Tolls, Master Of Puppets and NO new material. Which is awesome.

Taylor Hicks, who was an American Idol at some point, is coming to Broadway! Which is as good a reason as any to not come to Broadway.

And those cool winners the RIAA may have to pay a #$%! load of legal fees. Karma: still existing in 2008!

In summation:

Pete Wentz Celebrates With Bachelor Party in LA [People]

Metallica Play Club Show, Eye Fall Tour [Reuters]

Taylor Hicks To Play Teen Angel In Broadway's Grease [AP]

Judge Recommending Legal Fees In RIAA v. Andersen [Wired]

Tagged as: Music

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Britney In Rear-Ender

Posted on May 14, 2008 at 03:59 PM

Pic above of Sally Worth mentioning Vampire Weekend

It's been awhile since we mentioned our old friend Britney Spears around these parts. This Brit hiatus was and is a result of boredom, lack of truly weird news and plain old fatigue - hasn't the world had enough Britney? Allow us to answer our own semi-rhetorical question: who knows. But once in awhile, something so juicy, so bizarre, so straight up wack occurs that we must acknowledge said happening. That happening? Oh, nothing. She rear-ended a car the other day, that's all. But why is this news? It isn't. But it's in character, kinda pathetic, and it allows a million magazine editors and bloggers to run a headline similar to what you see above. Welcome back, Britney! (Get it, Back? never mind...)

Also Rustling In the Cultural Breeze...

Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo have hit the showers, in an end-of-the-relationship, not a steamy, way. This according to Alan Peppard, who appears to be a gossip columnist for The Dallas Morning News. What will Dallas-Fort Worth area gossip-hounds write about now? Do we care?

Just when you thought Vampire Weekend were everywhere, they are even more everywhere. Pitchfork reports that the Afropop appropriators were mentioned in Sally Worth. Yes, the comic strip Sally Worth.

Jay-Z has responded to Oasis guitarist Noel Gallagher's claim that hip-hop doesn't belong at Glastonbury, the long-running UK summer festival. The world has to change, according to Jay. It's a beautiful thing, he says. Rappers have paid their dues, Jay notes. Yawn. Before I was exited for Jay-Z's Glasto set. Now? Not so much.

Once Again...

Britney's Latest Smash Hit! [E! Online]

Sources Confirm Jessica Simpson / Tony Romo Break-up [Dallas Morning News]

Indie Rock Hits The Funny Pages, Again [Pitchfork]

I Got 99 Problems But the Pitch Ain't One [The Sun, via Stereogum]

Tagged as: Britney Spears , Celebs

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R.E.M. To W - Yes, I Would Like Fries With That

Posted on May 12, 2008 at 06:57 PM

Did you know that if you show up even a few minutes after McDonald's cut-off time for serving breakfast, and you want breakfast, you're screwed? It's true. Try it. No McGriddle For You. But we digress, before we even started. Here goes:

Peter Buck, the beloved, gentlemanly guitarist for R.E.M. has told President Bush to get a job - at McDonald's (oh snap)! According to Spinner, Buck recently mused to Uncut Magazine that there was probably a McDonald's somewhere that could use a manager and, according to Buck, "he seems like the kind of purse-mouthed snot nose who'd be great at terrifying 13-year-olds." And everyone else.

Also Wasting Our Time...

The Led Zeppelin touring rumors are kicking into gear again... According to the UK's The Mirror, Zep will tour at the end of this year or in early 2009. The source of this rumor mongering? None other than David Coverdale, the Whitesnake vocalist and Plant wannabe who was, of course, one half of Coverdale/Page (a 1993 very, very, very poor man's Page and Plant) and whom Plant famously has called David Coverversion. Coverdale seems to think Whitesnake will open this tour. Don't count on it.

Oasis are set to introduce their fourth drummer, if some blog is to be taken at its word. According to What Became Of The Likely Broads, current Oasis drummer (and son of Ringo Starr) Zak Starkey ain't getting along too well with Noel Gallagher these days. But that never stopped Liam from leaving.

And finally, Metallica launched an awesome new site called Mission: Metallica, in which we the devoted Metallica fans, get to eavesdrop on the recording of their newest album. Unfortunately, soon after launch, the site crashed. Unless Metallica is recording a hot new track called "403 Forbidden," that thing's downer than St. Anger sales figures.

Once again:

R.E.M. Guitarist Says President Bush Should Work At McDonald's [Spinner]

Led Zeppelin Set For World Tour [The Mirror]

Oasis Has A Lineup Change? [What's Become Of The Likely Broads]

Metallica's Mission Beta Site Goes Live (And Then It Goes Dead) [Blabbermouth.com]

Tagged as: Music

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A Cute Pop Star Has Acute Laryngitis

Posted on May 7, 2008 at 11:29 AM

In case you were unaware, Avril Lavigne's been all over this great continent of ours, bringing her "Best Damn Tour" to a corporately-named arena near you for awhile now. She was nearing the end but she just... couldn't... make it. Why? Homegirl's voxbox plain pooped out, Herb. In a message on her official site, Avril was un-Complicatedly contrite:

"My sincerest apologies to all of my fans. My intention was to complete the rest of the tour but tonight at sound check in Anaheim I realized this wasn't possible."

Pretty boring. Avril's kind of disappeared from the zeitgeist, has she not? Remember her clothing line?

Also Up In Our Grill:

The New York Post wonders if network television is the new rehab after Lindsay Lohan announces she will follow in Britney Spears' guest star footsteps and begin a six-episode stint on Ugly Betty. If one were to observe the actions of these stars, one would think that diminishing entertainment returns and dwindling respect levels are the "new rehab." And one would be right.

In other repellent Lohan news, People Mag and others are reporting that Lindsay "borrowed" an $11,000 mink fur coat she found after some fab party at some fab Manhattan joint (1Oak). According to the owner, she was unable to find her coat at the end of her partying on January 26th and assumed the coat was gone forever. That is, until she spotted Lohan wearing the coat in some celeb rag. After threatening to sue, she received a discreet phone call from some discreet people discreetly informing her that her coat was ready for pickup. BTW, the owner of the coat is a 22 year-old student at Columbia. She must have sold a lot of heavy books back last semester.

Finally, Scarlett Johansson is engaged to Van Wilder and has taken to showing off a rock as proof. The AP has a photo of her diamond-encrusted left hand. Stereogum has some video of her Tom Waits thing.

Tagged as: Celebs , Music

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The Police Like Trees

Posted on May 6, 2008 at 07:44 PM

Those hip old farts in The Police have been doing the reunion tour thang for about a year now, so they must be getting tired. Of playing, of each other, and of living in a van and loading their gear in each night to dive bars and smelly clubs. So to call attention to the end of this reunion tour, Sting, Andy Summers and Stewart Copeland gathered in Times Square today to announce that their final show ever would be... somewhere in New York. Where? Who knows. They didn't say! Which makes for a pretty un-dramatic press conference. So...

Why New York? And what's the deal with the trees? Well, they have decided to donate $1 million smackers to NYCs plan to plant a million trees by 2017. And, again, why New York? Well, The Police kicked off their first ever US tour thirty years ago with a gig at New York's late CBGBs. Now CBGBs is a John Varvatos store. So, um, they should go buy something. Right?

Tagged as: Music

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Nine Inch Nails Give Us The Slip

Posted on May 5, 2008 at 12:24 PM

Trent Reznor is really down with this whole shifting paradigm thing. Bare months after announcing a free Nine Inch Nails album (that would be Ghosts), Trent and his NIN compadres have given us The Slip, a "new full-length" Nine Inch Nails album. Unlike the Ghosts release, there is no option for paying anything, at all. It's all free - no matter which file version you choose. High quality MP3, FLAC, M4A or even 24/96 WAVE. Downloads include artwork and credits. Physical product fetishists can look forward to purchasing physical products in July.

How's he making money? Likely via licensing, merch and touring. When you can sell out arenas, you can afford to give away your albums.

Also Up In Our Bidness:

Pitchfork has some pics of this past weekend's Arcade Fire concert for Obama in North Carolina. Registered voters not pictured.

Mark Ronson has given Amy WInehouse the heave-ho from the new James Bond soundtrack, observing that she my not be ready to make music yet. That's ok, we weren't ready to hear it yet.

And finally, Kanye West hates Entertainment Weekly. He also probably hates the little subscription cards that come in Entertainment Weekly.

Tagged as: Music

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Celebrities and the Stupid People Like Us Who Love Them

Posted on May 2, 2008 at 06:04 PM

Tom Cruise ain't normal, but he's trying to trick us into thinking he is. Tom Cruise, it won't work. Speaking with Oprah Winfrey from his overstuffed couch near the mean streets of Telluride, Colorado, Cruise noted that he doesn't regret his sofa-leaping episode on a previous Oprah appearance, that he still loves Katie Holmes and that he was misunderstood regarding the whole Prescription Drugs Are Bad thing. And to clarify, he's "not sure" he would take the sofa-jumping back. So, he wouldn't take it back. But he's not sure.

Fame, Fame, Fatal Fame:

While in the Caribbean, Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon tied the knot, according to rumors and circumstantial evidence. Carey obtained a Bahamian marriage license this week, and later obtained a tropical drink with an umbrella in it, and later obtained sand in her shoes.

Madonna played an intimate, 32-minute set at Manhattan's Roseland Ballroom on Wednesday night for fans who had patiently waited up to sixty hours for entry. Thirty minute sets are about the average for marginally known indie bands playing in small clubs around the world, and now for Madonna, too.

And in possibly-fake sex tape news, the family and estate of Jimi Hendrix denies that a recently unearthed 1960's vintage sex tape features the legendary guitar player, claiming his presence is as unreal as the awesome, unreal lead line on Little Wing. Fans of salacious Hendrix imagery will have to be content with the original album cover of Electric Ladyland. [NSFW]

Tagged as: Celebs

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People Still Care About Coldplay

Posted on May 1, 2008 at 10:56 AM

So... Coldplay. They're big and famous. Hang with famous people. Make loads of cash money. But on the respect level, it's always been pretty slim pickin's for the NYC/West Village and London/Chelsea shuttling entourage (despite the very respectable A Rush Of Blood To The Head). Which may explain why Chris Martin and the Other Guys decided to enlist Brian Eno to produce their latest full-length, Viva La Vida Or Death And All His Friends. There a few musicians in the rock sphere who command more respect than Eno, who began his career with Roxy Music before producing Talking Heads, U2 and others and also releasing a series of acclaimed solo albums.

Now, you can hear the results for free. As Coldplay fans likely already know, Violet Hill, the first single from this new album, was made available free on Tuesday morning over at Coldplay's site. Apparently, people are still interested in what Mr. Paltrow is up to - according to the NME, over 600,000 people downloaded the track in the first 24 hours. The track will be free until early next week, after which you'll have to put in a little more effort to find a free copy.

Tagged as: Music

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